15/05/2009

MALIK AFORETHOUGHT



PROVING THAT SUNDAY MORNING reaches those greasy places that other bitter, twisted scouring pads can only dream about, we have the fact that after publishing my last piece of infotainment about our beloved leaders and their ridiculous expenses, which are obviously the result of special deals done by shifty businessmen, the irksome Daily Telegraph and the searching, prying chaps on the BBC and Sky News have finally cottoned on to the fact that some MPs are getting under the counter offers unavailable to the common punter.

DEFIANT LANCASHIRE MUSLIM LAD and now ex-justice minister Shahid Malik, speaking in his flat, northern twang, justifies his expenditure with the following, clarifying, if not grammatically sound, statement: “This is not your massage parlours, this is not your moats and Maltesers, this is your TV, just what is bigger than what you’ve got where you have yours, and it’s all one million per cent by the book.” “This”, by the way, is being charged only £100 per week for a house in his West Yorkshire constituency after securing a discount from Tahir Zaman, a local businessman and sometime criminal.

BIG-SPENDING MALIK POINTS OUT that he has done nothing wrong, yet “with hindsight” he would have done things differently. As a Muslim, Malik perhaps does not have the same view of what happens when one meets one’s maker as I do. But, as a believer in equality of religion throughout the globe and even for Thetans, I can see his point. I will definitely try this line out when I have to face my own maker sometime in the future.

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