THE LAST STRAW

CELEBRATING A BIRTHDAY immediately after the Christmas and New Year’s celebrations is a rather curious affair. It obviously means that one does not receive decent presents, as, after the hubble, bubble, toil and trouble of the festive season the last thing anyone wishes to do is go looking for a further present. Fortunately, now being an adult, this is no longer an issue for me, as I am perfectly happy to receive two or three pairs of socks for Christmas; another set for my birthday would just be distressing.

YET THE ADVANTAGE INVOLVED in celebrating one’s birthday within the twelve days is that one can relax at home and turn on the wireless or read the newspaper safe in the knowledge that one will not have one’s leisure time interrupted by politicians, most of whom wisely withdraw from public view for almost two weeks.

ALAS, SUCH BLISS CANNOT LAST FOREVER. This morning the Andrew Marr show was blighted by the appearance of David Cameron, using that whining voice of his to attempt to convince us that whatever it is that his government is doing with the left wing johnnies in the Liberal party is a success, despite the near anarchy going on in the travel industry, students attacking our police and the constant bickering in the lower house between Tories and Whigs, reminiscent of the late XIX century.

LIGHT RELIEF, HOWEVER, HAS BEEN PROVIDED by an old friend from the previous government, Jack Straw, famous some years ago for suggesting he would not talk to a woman if she visited his Saturday surgery wearing a veil – sparking a tirade of offence (against Straw) and defence of Shariya Law by most of his Blackburn constituency. Prior to this, Straw earned previous when he said, as Home Secretary, that the people of Liverpool, oft accused of being ne’er-do-well pilferers, were “always up to something”. His latest statement, in the wake of eight Asian members of a “rape group” being sentenced to prison, suggesting that many people of “Pakistani heritage” see white girls as “easy meat”, has led to calls for him to resign. Or perhaps be stoned to death. The official line from the Labour Party has fallen slightly short of suggesting that Pakistani men should be allowed to rape white women willy-nilly, but one does feel there is a return to the hated PC under Milliband.