PARISH NOTICES

GIVEN THE WAY THE NEWS is going at the moment, not to mention the world, which is only a sort of spin-off of the news for most people, it is hardly surprising that an implosion of values traditionally held as fast should lead to a simultaneous societal cling to the “old” (being the 1960s) or a flailing grasp at the “new” (being the “I’m-so-modern-I-don’t-mind-men-kissing-each-other-in-public-or-lesbians-doing-the-naughty-as-long-as-they-don’t-smoke-or-eat-meat) way of seeing the church and its role in our lives.

OF COURSE ANY DECENT MODERN chap who lives in a major city should think that the church is an outdated source of comfort and joy when seen in comparison with television advertisements or the increasingly mirrored-landscape of watching ourselves do what we do as “modern” people, dashing about the “modern” world.

ONE WOULD NOT HAVE EXPECTED David Cameron, who under no circumstances slips into these upper paragraphs, to be the killer of the Conservative Party and its conservative values; yet that is what is happening at the moment. By staunchly and stoutly defending “same-sex” marriage in church he is simply asking for trouble from the traditional Tories, who tend to bankroll the party.

NONE OF THESE GRANDEES would actually admit to being prejudiced against any of the “issues” involved in the “modern world” simply because they could not give a shit what the middle classes are up to as long as it does not affect them or cost them any money.

IN THE REAL WORLD, money is money, in the business world time is money and in the political world votes is money. The Tories who control what Cameron and Osborne are supposed to be doing will be on edge at the moment, fearful that one liberal step too far might be enough to let in a Labour government; and then bang goes the offshore, index-linked, capital-gains-protected, gilt-edged, blue-chip, trust-fund-protected, ring-fenced secure investment. And all because Cameron wants to feel hip by letting chaps kiss chaps in church.

MOST OF THEM ARE ALREADY annoyed enough after the wedding between Cameron and Clegg, and although Cameron seems to be wearing the trousers, Nick and his friend Vince appear to have the upper hand when it comes to the purse strings this month.